These are random musings of my life journey, the people, animals, places, and events which have woven, and continue to weave, a tapestry that is me. We all know there is no real destination, only the ongoing experiences which blend together, creating the trail. Each step gives a glimpse of what is to come, without allowing me to see the end result. It is exciting. I have a home base that is mine, that gives me a place to rest. This is it. This is where my heart is, no matter where I journey...................

Wednesday, November 20, 2013

Witness description of a car accident

This is very, very funny! I seriously laughed until tears were rolling and I was coughing! Maybe you should go pee before you listen to this. I know it shouldn't be this funny to talk about a car accident, but you'll understand when you hear it!

Here is what the intro said:
When this guy calls his boss to tell him he’s running a little late, he witnesses a car accident and begins the best play-by-play commentary you’ll ever hear.
Right after the car accident happens, the caller states that a man gets out of his car as if the other car was at fault. What happens next is pure entertainment.
The witness leaves the literal blow-by-blow action to his boss while laughing hysterically.
Apparently this is the real deal, and how could it not be? This is too good to make up.
 Sorry, I couldn't post the vid here. Something wasn't working right, just not blog-friendly, but just click on the link below.

Kids Lip-Syncing A Wonderful Christmas Song

This was sent to me via an email, and it is a fabulous, funny, sweet video!  These kids are truly priceless!  I laughed so hard the dogs were checking me out, and I had to watch it again. And again! It's great!


Kids Lip-Syncing A Wonderful Christmas Song

Tuesday, November 19, 2013

Existential Bummer

This came from a friend whose life is winding down, perhaps more rapidly than some of the rest of us. We had a long, sweet talk about living life fully, whatever that means to each of us, and the joys of having friends who are there to the end, those who love us in spite of ourselves.  It is sweet and wise.

Remember to enjoy life as much as possible, to live it as big as you can, because you just never know .....

Tuesday, November 05, 2013

Random thoughts

  • I am a big fan of 1950s oldies music. Always have been. It's the music I grew up with, through grade school (older sibling listened to it), through junior high and high school. Just recently, I wanted something different, and I thought, "Well, I liked some of the '60s music, too," so I flipped the Sirius radio in the car to that station. I'm so glad I did! I'd forgotten about a lot of that music, yet I enjoyed it "back in the day." I graduated from high school in 1962, so it was the music of those couple years, and then through my young adult years it is what I listened to. So glad I found the other part of my memory-music!
  • As I've listened to that era, I have been reminded how much I like Neil Diamond's music. Almost all his songs touch me deeply for some reason. Haven't figured out the reason, but they do. And always did, but I forgot!
  • I've had a little crush on Harrison Ford for years, but I didn't realize it until just recently!
  • It is interesting to watch the trackers on the blog. Recently (last few days), there has been a huge influx of visitors from all around the world:  Brazil, Argentina, France, Italy,  Poland, Macedonia, Japan, Mexico, Honduras, Russian Federation, Kuwait, Finland, Israel, Switzerland, .... and of course, the usual ....UK,  and Canada. I wonder why?
  • I've noticed something that bothers me. In this age of media addiction, with people spending more and more time with TV, movies, the internet, there are some awful examples of what examples we give our children. Lines such as: little girl, "What is a humanitarian?" father, "Someone who hasn't won an Oscar." and the dad walks out of the room. If a parent in real life says such a thing and doesn't explain the "satire" in it, I wonder what youngsters and young parents take away from that movie about how to parent.
  • My life is good!

Sunday, October 06, 2013

What's up with Jazmyn?

Since early September, Jazmyn has been very determined to be close to me. It's not that she is clingy, never leaves my side, but she has been more likely to want to be beside me on the couch or in bed. She has always "assumed" that she belongs near me, as she is the alpha dog, but this is above and beyond that.

Like right now. She has wedged herself between my thigh and the back of the couch. Then she rolled herself back, so she is leaning against the couch, sitting up like a little person, tucked under my arm, and against my ribs. She sits like this a lot. She used to do it occasionally, but now it is every day, more than once if the chance presents.

So why is she doing this? What brought it on? I don't know, but there are several things that have happened in the time frame around this.

First, this summer I learned a new way to deal with the dogs when they are frightened by thunder. Jazi has been afraid of thunder for quite a long time, I want to say about 4-5 years. Gradually the other dogs have picked up on her fear, so when there is thunder, I have five dogs on me, near me, close by. Sometimes, it smothers me! I was talking to a friend who is a psychic. She uses her skills, free of charge to help bring lost animals back. If you've read here for a while, you might remember when I was in Florida and Max ran away. She helped me and the house sitter to bring him home. Anyway, I was at her house one day this summer, and it began thundering. I said I should get home because of the dogs. She mentioned that her dogs (Great Pyrenees) were afraid of it, too, but she told them "It's just government business." When she does, they are OK. Strange, right?  Well, I asked her what that means, and she said she really doesn't know, but one of her dog spirits told her that. When she asked what it meant, the spirit just laughed and didn't give her an answer to that. But it worked, so she didn't care.

So I began using that phrase. It worked!!! It took several attempts before it worked, but within a couple weeks, the thunder wasn't a big deal! Now, I admit, they still like to sit near me when there is a storm or if the jets from the Air Force base are flying patterns over us, but none of them lose their cool anymore. Jaz used to shake so hard that she could hardly breathe, and now she just stays close to me, looking a bit worried, but no shaking.

So .... is Jaz relieved and thankful that I gave her peace and a quality of life free of that wrenching fear with the silly phrase "It's just government business"?

I finally .... finally .... secured the deck so that she can no longer escape. I've wondered if she feels safe at long last. She is finally  able to be in our home spot with no fear and with fear no longer driving her to seek whatever it is that she has sought before.

So .... is it the security that causes her to be comfortable and contented. Does she understand that I did that for her?

In early  September, I was gone to a retreat for the Healing Touch. I wasn't gone completely, as I was home at night, but the four days were long with me leaving early in the morning, around 7:30, and not getting home until around 8:00 at night. I've thought about the fact that she might have been afraid I was going to leave her, and has decided to keep me in her sights.

So .... is Jazmyn determined to stay as close as possible because I was gone too much?

Recently I was talking with a friend about this, and she proposed something I hadn't thought about. She said that she has seen or felt a significant shift in me since the retreat. The shift is a good one, a healthy shift toward my spiritual side. She said she has sensed a truly warm, welcoming, loving aura that just keeps growing and expanding all the time. And her thought was that perhaps Jazi is sensing this and simply wants to be near me, connected to the aura. Hmm. Interesting thought.

So .... is Jazi basking in the beautiful energy that I'm learning to work with?

I have no idea, but I'm enjoying having her close. Jazmyn has been a special little dog since the get-go. I love all five, each in her/his own way, but Jazi is"my baby."  And it's so sweet to have her being my special, close puppy-friend these days.

My life is good these days. It is peaceful, low-key, simple. In fact, I haven't said this i a long time, but it seems quite appropriate .....

.... Life is beautiful!!!!

Wednesday, October 02, 2013

Deep thoughts this morning

A couple things I've read this morning have brought me to much thought:

“Make a radical change in your lifestyle and begin to boldly do things which you may previously never have thought of doing, or been too hesitant to attempt. So many people live within unhappy circumstances and yet will not take the initiative to change their situation because they are conditioned to a life of security, conformity, and conservation, all of which may appear to give one peace of mind, but in reality nothing is more damaging to the adventurous spirit within a man than a secure future. The very basic core of a man's living spirit is his passion for adventure. The joy of life comes from our encounters with new experiences, and hence there is no greater joy than to have an endlessly changing horizon, for each day to have a new and different sun. If you want to get more out of life, you must lose your inclination for monotonous security and adopt a helter-skelter style of life that will at first appear to you to be crazy. But once you become accustomed to such a life you will see its full meaning and its incredible beauty."
— Jon Krakauer

 and .....

Eyes wide open, expecting the best but camouflage spots prepared to hide. The fawn is like the delicate and vulnerable part in all of us; wanting to trust, but needing to protect. We live in this blurred space between innocence and protection. Nurture your inner fawn so you can find your feet, set healthy boundaries and experience as much love and wonder as possible.

What do you think?  Please think about this a moment before you read on, because I want your reflections, your response to my question to be yours, not influenced by my own thoughts.

~    ~    ~    ~

I agree with both. The first I had to re-read to absorb it, but after I did, I realize I do allow randomness in my life, more and more as time goes on, because I am finding peace in "allowing." I am allowing myself to be led by my higher spirit. There is great joy in that, and comfort in that I know I am guided in my randomness. I am growing so much since I have let go of many expectations for what I can and can't do, and I am letting myself expand beyond what I thought could be possible.

As for the second ... I am cautious about decisions regarding who I will allow into my inner circle. What trips me up is having allowed a person in and then having something go wrong. Perhaps they have hidden a trait, perhaps I overlooked it, or we grow apart in some way, and the parting is, well, ungraceful. Balancing between caution and my natural habit of accepting people where they are, as they present themselves, can be tricky. I think I'm doing better, although the last couple years have been a challenge. I've let my guard down a few times, haven't minded my boundaries, and I've been pushed. The work problems have been mostly because I trusted others to be professional and ethical without giving it much thought. I should know that people aren't always honest about things when it comes to "getting ahead." In my personal life, I accept people as they present, but don't allow them close until I am sure who they are. A few mistakes here and there, but overall, a good balance, I think.

~    ~    ~    ~

 Be happy today!

Sunday, September 29, 2013

Disguised blessings and love

Do you have moments when you wonder where you are going and when you're going to get there? I've come to the conclusion that the answer for me is "Everywhere and never"!!

I'm so glad that God's plan is bigger than I can even imagine, because it takes me in so many directions that keep me alive and growing. I've finished all the classes for Healing Touch now, and I'm working on finishing up the final details for certification. Now that I've completed the classes, I'm slowing down and not pushing so hard as I have been over the last year. My deadlines are finished, and the actual certification can wait.

The Healing Touch work I am doing is so fulfilling. I have believed in this work for a long time, but it is always a challenge for me to believe I am doing it. In the past weeks, I've been the facilitator of work that has improved the lives of several people I work with. And I'm always amazed. Should I be? I don't know. I believe in the work, the process. What is the amazing part is that I am capable of being part of it! Here's why ....

I'm a "healer." I have been for a long time, as a friend, as a mom and a daughter and a sister, as a mental health counselor, and in many other roles. It is something that goes back to my childhood, as I can see in retrospect. I didn't identify it in that way until recently, although there are several people through my life who have said so to me. I poo-pooed it and just moved on. Or, in some of those remarks, I read it to be the skills I had as a clinical social worker, a mental health healer. I just didn't see the underlying trait that goes back to early childhood. Now I do, but I'm still in a state of amazement.

The most amazing part of this for me is that it isn't me. Yes, I have that trait. But it isn't me, except that I have opened myself to possibilities. I have a mantra which I say almost every day. It is "Make me a vessel." I say that because I know my work is not me. It comes from a higher power, call it God or the Universe or Spirit. This energy or power is poured into me, the vessel, and I pour it into my clients, my friends, my family.

When I say "I'm a healer," I don't mean "I'm a healer," I mean "I'm a healer." I don't believe I do the healing, but I'm a willing, trained conduit for the healing process. In the same vein, when I was doing psychotherapy, I didn't see myself as the one who did the change, rather the one who guided clients to make choices that changed their lives. I was good at my job, but they made the changes. I was the vessel. I am the vessel now.

Over the last several years, but particularly the last 18 months, I've experienced a number of tough events. Health issues, nasty work events, people who chose to not be in my life, fear of losing my home to fire, a senseless rear-end wreck, etc. I've questioned why. I've no answers. Until recently.

I'm finally understanding some of it. I was reluctant to take the steps to become trained in Healing Touch, and some of these events which challenged my faith in my Higher Power or at least in the wisdom and sense of fairness of that higher power, have encouraged changes in my path, my decisions. I'm stubborn. I'm hard headed. Sometimes I need a kick in the tush to make changes in my life. I see the hardships as pivotal. I've not lost anything of importance, only things that were holding me back from making decisions. And what I've gained .... unbelievable!

Every day I'm realizing my blessings, old ones and new. I love this work. I love seeing the improvement in lives as I work with people. Energy is everywhere, we are energy, and energy has no bounds. Our energies overlap, or more accurately all energy is one. So when I work with a client, I'm simply directing our energy in helpful ways. It still blows my socks off when I see the result! I have three clients who have had chronic pain lasting years. After a few weeks, all three are markedly improved, having only minor pain occasionally. In another person, I discovered a spinal curvature, probably result of a serious fall she had almost a year ago which damaged many parts of her body. After working on her, the spine actually straightened! I was humbled to be the vessel in all of these, but actually seeing the bones of the spine being moved into alignment .... how could I not believe in the power?

And it's not me. I'm just the guide, the facilitator. I'm just happy to be trained to help this happen. And I'm really thankful for the events that led me to this work.


Tuesday, September 17, 2013

Feeling a bit of outrage today.

My knickers are in a knot.

I just posted this on FB:
I've worked with dysfunctional families, and I've come to "understand" some of the idiosyncracies that make it work for them. But I've encountered one I can't get resolved in my mind. 
An acquaintance left her husband because "he is an alcoholic and mentally abusive." OK, got that. Then she said she was leaving the children with him while she completed her education "so she could support the kids." Hmm. She already has a degree and a job teaching, but if it would "improve her situation substantially." Why leave the kids in a potentially abusive situation (historically, when the object of abuse leave, the anger is redirected onto others in the immediate area), even if it means scraping to support them? Next she finished the degree and MOVED 1500 MILES AWAY FROM THE KIDS!!!

Nope, I can't reconcile this in my head, not at all. If being a parent isn't your forte, own it, but don't throw the children to the wolves or be untruthful about the other parent to cover your own guilt. I don't know which is true, but either way it is just w.r.o.n.g. Children are not incidental.
I unfriended the acquaintance because I don't care to be an observer any longer. I really don't know what is going on, I haven't asked details since shortly after she finished school. At that time, she said "I don't want to uproot the kids until I'm settled." I kept waiting for over four years to hear about the children, an update of some sort, but she never says anything. But now a year and a half or perhaps two years after she finished school, she doesn't even write about them, except for a brief acknowledgement of the eldest graduating from high school. That was in May. Her posts on FB are all about her activities, how her life is "growing and changing," how much she loves her job teaching(!!!). I finally couldn't take it any more and unfriended her today.

I donno. Maybe I expect too much, but I don't see how she can love teaching other kids when her own are in what she described as a jeapardous situation. I've considered that perhaps she can't get her children back, perhaps because of something she did, rather than by choice, but whether she chooses to not have her children or isn't allowed, it just seems wrong. We talked a bit when she left the home, and she merely insisted it was because of him. Whatever, I just can't imagine (1) putting her children in danger, or (2) not owning her truth, even if it is painful.

OK, I'm through. Sorry for the rant. But I needed to vent.  Thanks for your patience!