These are random musings of my life journey, the people, animals, places, and events which have woven, and continue to weave, a tapestry that is me. We all know there is no real destination, only the ongoing experiences which blend together, creating the trail. Each step gives a glimpse of what is to come, without allowing me to see the end result. It is exciting. I have a home base that is mine, that gives me a place to rest. This is it. This is where my heart is, no matter where I journey...................

Sunday, May 10, 2009

25 Reasons I Owe My Mother


No regular funnies today, but in lieu, here are some Mother's Day thoughts for every one.


  1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE .
    'If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning.'
  2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
    'You better pray that will come out of the carpet.'
  3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL .
    'If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!'
  4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
    ' Because I said so, that's why.'
  5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC .
    'If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me.'
  6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
    'Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident.'
  7. My mother taught me IRONY
    'Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about.'
  8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
    'Shut your mouth and eat your supper.'
  9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM .
    'Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!'
  10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
    'You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone.'
  11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
    'This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it.'
  12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
    'If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!'
  13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE .
    'I brought you into this world, and I can take you out.'
  14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
    'Stop acting like your father!'
  15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
    'There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do.'
  16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
    'Just wait until we get home.'
  17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING .
    'You are going to get it when you get home!'
  18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
    'If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way.'
  19. My mother taught me ESP.
    'Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?'
  20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
    'When that lawn mower cuts off your foot, don't come running to me.'
  21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT .
    'If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up.'
  22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
    'You're just like your father.'
  23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
    'Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?'
  24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
    'When you get to be my age, you'll understand.'
  25. And my favorite: My mother taught me about JUSTICE
    'One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you.'
I won't make you say which, but if you owed a dollar for each one you made you mother say, tell us how many dollars you need to pay her!

~ ~ ~ ~

Oh, OK, quit sniveling. scroll down to the next post for a handful of funnies. What a bunch of .... kids you are!



  1. Happy Mother's Day Lynilu! :)

  2. Thanks, Seamus. And wish Mrs. S the same from me. :)

  3. I lost track of the $ amount a long, long time ago. Of what I owe my mom and what I should receive from my kids. :)
    Have a wonderful Mother's Day.


  4. That's true. The figure would be over the rainbow, wouldn't it? :)

  5. This is great! It's in the style of Erma Bombeck. I love it.


  6. Good! Does this make up for the Mama post?

  7. Oh Lyn what memories this brought back. My mother said all these things too, but I in turn have repeated most of them over the past 47 years. My kids always wondered how I could do half of those things. My mother used to better eat your supper...there are children starving in China. Wonder which of many countries we could use now? Hope you have a great day.

  8. Thank you for the laughs Its needed here.

  9. Ruth, you and I are both seasoned enough to appreciate this from both sides! I think my mom said China, too!! It must have the the impoverished nation de jour, er de era!

    Bobbie, I'm glad it brought you laughs. :)

  10. This was wonderful, so funny! My amount would be too high to figure. Oh, how many of those gems sound like ones I heard growing up. Reframing them and seeing the wisdom is very clever. I'm still laughing.

  11. Cheryl, I laughed all the way through it, too. It made me think of the times when our best parenting skill are shot down with how we frame them.

  12. It's amazing how many of these I remember from my childhood too.

  13. Dave, I think it was epidemic in our childhoods!

  14. Oh how these are so true...


If you have something to say about it, just stick out your thumb, and I'll slow down so you can hop aboard! But hang on, 'cause I'm movin' on down the road!!! No time to waste!!!