These are random musings of my life journey, the people, animals, places, and events which have woven, and continue to weave, a tapestry that is me. We all know there is no real destination, only the ongoing experiences which blend together, creating the trail. Each step gives a glimpse of what is to come, without allowing me to see the end result. It is exciting. I have a home base that is mine, that gives me a place to rest. This is it. This is where my heart is, no matter where I journey...................

Thursday, February 03, 2011


Have no regrets. The elderly usually don't have regrets for what they did, but rather for things they did not do. The only people who fear death are those with regrets.    


A friend recently posted a question about what you would say to your self if you could go back to a certain time. I really struggled with that. Not that I've lived such a perfect life that there was no advice to give to a younger me, but I just couldn't come up with something that seemed significantly important.

The time frame my friend used was fairly short, at least in my long life, just eight years. Now, perhaps if I could go back and stop myself from taking certain paths, I might. The trouble with that is that if I changed my course, I would have missed out on some other wonderful things that came after I made such decisions. So even then, it would be difficult for me to tell my younger ego anything that could change it.

As to that quote above, it's not that I have absolutely no regrets. I do. But I've dealt with those regrets and resolved most of them. I've forgiven others, and I've forgiven myself. I come to grips with shortcomings or overstepping occurring through my life. I think I'm pretty much as "regret free" as possible. And I love this state of being, because I live my life without a fear of death. I haven't feared death for a long time, but now that I've worked through some of those unfortunate events in my life, I'm really free.

So I'm wondering .... would you like to skip back and have a chat with a younger you? How are you in the regret free status?


  1. The trouble is that I am honest enough to admit that the headstrong me of long ago, probably wouldn't listen to the wiser me of now. So yes...... I do have regrets, but that is where forgiveness comes in, and so all is not lost, rather lessons are (hopefully learned.)

  2. "And some of your elders remember pleasures with regret like wrongs committed in drunkenness.
    But regret is the beclouding of the mind and not its chastisement.
    They should remember their pleasures with gratitude, as they would the harvest of a summer." - Kahlil Gibran

    I only have minor regrets - that are more like missed opportunities for some fun or a great experience.

  3. Yes! I did some things when I was in my 20's that i regret. I do not dwell on them and know I cannot change them, but if I could go back and prevent them I would do so.

    I also would tell myself to be a much more generous and thoughtful person. I could have given so much more.

  4. Definitely regrets about things my younger self did and things I did not do. But, like Freda, forgiveness is available. No. I would not go back to give advice. That younger self, just like my adult children, had to make her own decisions and learn life's lessons. Living in the moment now, I have all I can do NOT to give unasked for advice to my kids and spouses!

  5. I do have one regret Lyn. And that is that I wish I would have spent more time with my mom the last few years. I really thought she'd be around longer as my grandmothers lived into their late 80's and early 90's.
    But I remember our last conversation on the phone and we both said I love you before hanging up. That gives me some comfort. Other than that I believe that if things would have been different in any way, I wouldn't have been blessed with my three children. Granted I went through a lot with each pregnancy but the results were well worth the sacrifices! Love Di ♥

  6. Brings back memories of a much younger me and pretty girls who at one time or another showed an interest in me but I was too shy or stuck up to try to strike up a friendship with them.

  7. Freda, yes, forgiveness plays a huge role, doesn't it? It's not worth carrying around loads of guilt or anger. :)

    Cyndi, what a good way to look at it. It is good to have a healthy harvest.

    Merikay, I hear you. I have thought that even if I could change things, I'm not sure I would. Oh, I'd LIKE to, but if it changed the outcome of my life?? I donno, maybe not! Food for thought, at any rate, and I do think about it, but without angst.

    LC, well said!

    Di, that time with mom is something I think most of us regret. :') I'm glad you have that comforting final conversation with her.

    Dave, I've had similar memories about teen years. No one every believes I was shy, because I didn't let it show, but I had similar hesitations. But on the other hand, that is who was.

  8. If I could live my life over, I would have divorced my husband after my last child was born. I should have, but back in the 50s, it wasn't much of an option. Some things are so much better for women than the old dark ages.

  9. Not just the 50s, Moni. I hung on to my second marriage long after I should have, and that ended with his demise in 2005. It's just a hard thing for people of our generation. Seems all too easy for many today.

  10. I wrote some about this on your friend's blog but I've been thinking of it alot since then too. Do I have regrets? Of course I do. Would I change anything? Some things, yes. Most things? Eh. What would be different if I did change them? Would I have my children? My granddaughter? The man I love now? I don't know and am grateful I don't have to find out. I do have regrets. I do wish some things had been different. I hope I'm old enough and on my way to wise enough to forgive myself for what I did/didn't do and to forgive others for what was done.


If you have something to say about it, just stick out your thumb, and I'll slow down so you can hop aboard! But hang on, 'cause I'm movin' on down the road!!! No time to waste!!!