These are random musings of my life journey, the people, animals, places, and events which have woven, and continue to weave, a tapestry that is me. We all know there is no real destination, only the ongoing experiences which blend together, creating the trail. Each step gives a glimpse of what is to come, without allowing me to see the end result. It is exciting. I have a home base that is mine, that gives me a place to rest. This is it. This is where my heart is, no matter where I journey...................

Saturday, June 03, 2006

Putting myself out there . . . nervously

I took a day of (mostly) rest today. I've been worried about what-to-do, what-to-do. But nothing is resolved by worry, now is it? So today I decided that I'd just put it on the back burner for a few days, and in addition, just have a kick-back day. It felt really good. I did a little work in the afternoon, just some organizing to put my tools all in the same location which will help me be able to find them when I need them. The only other thing I did today was go buy dog food for my babies and put gas in the car and ran through the car wash. Oh, yeah, I got a hair cut this morning. Hmmm. I thought I had a lazy day, but all the sudden, it seems I was actually busier than I thought!

I've made a decision to use this blog to begin putting some of my creative writing out to be read. Over the years, I've written a lot of poetry and some essays. I'll start today with a poem I wrote a couple years ago after one of my trips to New Mexico. I was feeling homesickness as I always do when I come away from the land when where my heart resides, regardless of where my body exists. I hope you enjoy it.


I close my eyes
and almost stop breathing.
And then,
if I am very quiet,
I hear it,
the desert wind
softly whistling
in the age-worn clefts
of the sandstone in the canyon.
It is music to my ears,
sounds not heard for so long,
and my heart soars with the wind.

Ahhh, I smell the sagebrush,
stirred by the same wind,
branches rubbing against one another,
releasing the scent of home
into the nostrils of my memory.
How I'’ve missed it.
I miss it still but for this quiet dream.

I try to capture the warmth
of the desert sun
against my eyelids
and to feel the sand swirling
against my ankles.
But it doesn'’t come.
I can't find it,
and I fear my struggle
for this next fantasy
will take away
the sage and the wind.

I try to not move,
not open my eyes
or hear the everyday sound around me,
for if I do,
I will lose the illusion,
and I'’m not ready to go on with today.
I want yesterday to stay with me
until tomorrow.



This is my daily struggle, to recall enough of the sensory memories to make each day away from the Desert South palatable, and to hold me strong in my tasks leading me there.%2

3 comments:

  1. I really like this poem. I am proud of you for putting this online. I think this is one of the first poems I have read of yours. You can really tell from this poem where your heart is. Hang in there, you make it there one day.

    One way to really get people to check out your blog is to comment on theirs. You might go through my links of the blogs I read and if you feel like it put a comment. The ones on my blog under links are the ones I read the most.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Caroline, I thought you'd read some of my writings! Wow! How did I let you get away without forcing some of it down your throat? I have to admit that what I write about in poetry or prose form is with passion, for certain. I'll post more as time goes on. Thanks!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Your courage is appreciated. Thank you for sharing your work with us.

    ReplyDelete

If you have something to say about it, just stick out your thumb, and I'll slow down so you can hop aboard! But hang on, 'cause I'm movin' on down the road!!! No time to waste!!!