These are random musings of my life journey, the people, animals, places, and events which have woven, and continue to weave, a tapestry that is me. We all know there is no real destination, only the ongoing experiences which blend together, creating the trail. Each step gives a glimpse of what is to come, without allowing me to see the end result. It is exciting. I have a home base that is mine, that gives me a place to rest. This is it. This is where my heart is, no matter where I journey...................

Wednesday, June 06, 2007

Just Throw All My Thoughts In A Blender and .....

Once again, I’m trying to figure out what to write about, and I have a plethora of thoughts, all very unrelated. I could call it another potpourri. Or I could call it scattered thoughts. And someone else might call it crazy thought patterns. Oh well!

This morning I showered and as is my routine, I reached out and grabbed my terry-turban or after-shower-head-wrap. I started to dry my face, and saw a ball of lint on it. Thank goodness I didn’t reach to pull it off with my hand, because when I looked more closely, it was a spider. Now ... I’m not afraid of spiders, but the situation startled me, especially since I think it was a brown recluse. I shook it off into the shower floor and turned the shower back on to wash it down the drain. I don’t like that kind of close call! The thought of wrapping the turban, spider included, around my scalp still gives me the chills!

I had a funny thought afterward, however. Glenn and his kids used to tell about “the spider lady,” a woman he dated ... briefly!!! ... while he was divorced. Every time she came to their house, spiders came, literally, out of the woodwork and crawled toward her! Yeah, that relationship didn’t last long!! Anyway ......

It has been incredibly windy here today. I was on the road halfway between the tow sets of mountains, the Capitans and Sierra Blanca, and there was so much dust or whatever in the air that neither was clearly visible! It was almost as if there were clouds/fog, but, no, it was crud floating around. It was white, and we wondered if it might be sand from the White Sands, about 50 miles away. The wind was the right direction, and it was blowing hard enough to be possible. I heard this evening that some wind gusts were clocked at close to 70 MPH! Holy Toledo!!

I tried a new ice cream flavor a few days ago. The market has a Ben and Jerry’s case at the front of the store. I saw Coffee Heath Bar Crunch. There was no need to twist my arm. Oooouuu, was it good! The good thing about pints of B & J and living alone is this: I bring it home, put it in the freezer, and when I want some of it, I just open the freezer, pull off the lid, grab a spoon and eat right out of the carton! Put it away and next time ..... I know, I’m shameless. But it is simply one of my delicious, guilty pleasures. So, bite me. And remember when you visit me .... you can have ice cream, but only from the half gallons; the pints are mine, and I put my spoon back in the carton with my slobbery spit on it! Ha! Mine, MINE, ALL MINE!!!!

Last is a biggie. I think. Maybe. All the sudden it seems that there are a couple of men showing some interest in me. I think. Maybe. I’m not sure, ‘cause this is foreign territory to me. I haven’t given a lot of thought to these situations for a very long time, and I’m not sure I would recognize “interest” if it smacked me in the face!

I mentioned a movie I recently bought to one man the other day, and he more or less invited himself over (“I’ll bring the organic popcorn.”) to watch it. Now, I thought it was just a friendly gesture, but Scott, Connie and Allan, who were all there, seemed to think otherwise. I don’t know. Maybe.

The other is going through a divorce, but has invited me to dinner (with others present) and whom I’ve reciprocated (with other guests invited). Neither time did it work out so we had dinner, and neither time did I think much about it. Yesterday he brought it up again, and I said we’ll have dinner when things in his life are less complicated; that way the proprieties would be easier to work with (just meaning that if there were gossip, it wouldn’t be a big deal; right now, people might misinterpret the friendship for something else making the divorce process somewhat icky). He said that the divorce is in progress and it really didn’t matter if he wants to have dinner with anyone. No, I wouldn’t do so, but it was a wake up call for me. I guess I’m naive at times, taking things in their purest form. I’m so out of practice that I don’t “get it,” most of the time! In fact, I said something to that effect to another person who was present, that I need to start paying attention to signs because I don’t think I even know how male/female relationships work anymore, and he interjected, “It’s just like riding a bicycle, Lyn.” Yeah. OK. Maybe. I donno.

Boy, do I feel like a fish out of water right now!! I’m absolutely lost!!

But if I recognize a bicycle in front of me, I’ll give it a spin. Maybe. I think.


  1. Night before last, I ate B & J's Cherry Garcia out of the container.

  2. Oooh I love having my own pint of ice cream..It's one of the best perks of living alone! :)

  3. Is there any other way to eat B & Js? Seriously?

    And the men...and dating. ACK! Right? Good luck with all that...I hope it's fun, fun, fun. I can relate to not knowing how the game is played. It's been almost 10 years since I dated. I find myself asking these men questions about dating. Which, so far, they chuckle at....ahhh...enjoy. :-)

  4. Daisy - Cherry Garcia is one of my favorites, but then isn't that true of everyone? I have to admit that Coffee Heath Bar Crunch just might take my top choice now, however!

    Jen - Yep, a top perk for us "lonies," ice cream without having to share!

    Jenn - You're right ... there is no other way to eat it!

    Dating ... why is it so difficult??? I'm able to be me in any social situation, but this is a category of its own!! I feel like I need training wheels on that bicycle! I need to call a friend who is near my age and went through this not long ago. She survived several years of"singledom after a long marriage" and is now blissfully remarried. I remember her asking me advice, and I had nothing. NOTHING!! I hope she has something for me ... advise for "elder-dating"!!!

    Good luck to you, too. It can't get worse, right????

  5. I love B & J's Chubby Hubby! Yum!

    You & Jenn ought to compare notes on jumping back in the dating pool. I wouldn't trade places even though my hub has been a "pill" lately.

  6. Ok, I don't care about the ice cream. I want to hear more about you dating. :) I am so happy for you. I hope you find someone that makes you really happy; you really deserve that. exciting.

  7. It is hard to take the step in dating again. I know, I have been avoiding it for 15 years. My neighbors that I was gay but that is another long story.

    I am happy to hear you are stepping out. When someone invites themselves over with organic popcorn I would have to say he is DEFINITELY interested. Go for it.

  8. Pepper - es. I don't even know how to read men in a personal light. That is why my trepedition is so high. I can read them in professional settings, I can read them as my friends hubs, but I freeze up when it comes to something that might be personal for me!!

    And re: Organic Popcorn ... it is at least a friendship being offered. I can live with that!!!

  9. I CAN TOO SPELL!! I was correcting my typos, and I accidentally sent the blasted thing!

    That should begin with "Yes," not "es." I do not talk like a 2 year old, I promise.

    And the word is "trepidation."

    It is now with trepidation that I approach the keyboard for the rest of the day. Sheesh.

  10. I'm definitely having a rough morning! I can't seem to get everything in the right order and the fingers on the right keys!! AARRRRGGGHHH!

    Patti - Recently I read or heard someone say something about the dating pool needing some chlorine!! Yeah, not the easiest place to be. Hubs can be "pills" without being worthy of discarding, for sure! Gosh, I'll bet *you're* a pill sometimes, too! LOL! I'm feeling both eager and terrified, personally!

    Caroline - HA!!! You nosy wretch!! You don't really think I will air much about that part of my life, do you? You know better! But thanks, I'm hoping for happy, too. It would be nice to have a life ... what a novel concept!! ... with good people nearby.


If you have something to say about it, just stick out your thumb, and I'll slow down so you can hop aboard! But hang on, 'cause I'm movin' on down the road!!! No time to waste!!!