These are random musings of my life journey, the people, animals, places, and events which have woven, and continue to weave, a tapestry that is me. We all know there is no real destination, only the ongoing experiences which blend together, creating the trail. Each step gives a glimpse of what is to come, without allowing me to see the end result. It is exciting. I have a home base that is mine, that gives me a place to rest. This is it. This is where my heart is, no matter where I journey...................

Wednesday, January 16, 2008

A Whine Kinda Day

I am not having a good day. I woke this morning with aches in all parts of my body. I know what it is. Unfortunately I'm highly familiar with the sensations. It's my old buddy, fibromyalgia.

I had planned to go to work today, but I called and explained. I just couldn't face going out in the cold. I'm hurting anyway, and the cold just exacerbates it. I took some Tylenol (Arthritis strength X 2, pow, bam, zowie!!) and it has eased me a little, but not enough to change my mind about going out. I am doing some of the work from here at home, but I'm still miserable.

I've been getting up and doing things around the house, because I feel better if I don't just curl into a ball and whimper. The movement actually helps, but I have to be careful to avoid overdoing. It's a fine line.

My only venture out of the house was to feed the feral kitty. I encountered him/her yesterday and it seems that he is getting used to me. A little bit. A wee little bit. He was eating when I walked out the door to go to work, and he skittered off the deck quickly. I started calling to him, hoping he would realize that I wasn't going to hurt him. He didn't come back up while I was there, but he only went as far as under the steps. I went down the steps, still talking with him, and he began to meow at me! He has never "talked" to me before. I kept talking in a quiet voice, and he came a little closer, but stayed under the steps, just peeking at me between them. After I got into the truck he jumped back up onto the steps and went to finish his meal.

I hope to have him get used to me by summer, so that he can be on the deck without fear when I'm out there. He is far too wild to consider being a "pet," but if he will just accept me as a helpful, nonthreatening human, it would be nice.

He is a very large long-haired light grey and dark grey striped cat. One of these days I'll probably name him if he continues to come around. I thought about "Thunder" since his colors of those of a thundercloud, but when he meowed at me yesterday, he has a very high, almost squeaky voice, so Thunder doesn't seem to fit him! I considered "Smokey" because of the color, also. It would be fitting because we live in the land of Smokey Bear, b ut I'm not terribly excited with that. Maybe I should call him "Poof," because he is a long-haired poofy cat and because he is here and ... poof ... he is gone!! I'll think of something.

He has a bad eye. I'm not sure if it is a terrible infection sealing it about halfway closed, or if he is actually missing the eye. I kinda thing it might be the latter. Poor baby. I'll keep feeding and trying to diminish his fears and hopefully he will find my deck, either on it or safely under it, as a reasonable home. If he does, I'll see about building him a shelter at the far end or underneath. I haven't seen him today. Hmmm.

I should get up and walk around a little and then get back to work. Hope everyone is having a good day! And in spite of my whining I still think ....

Life is beautiful!!!

13 comments:

  1. From another long-time FM sufferer, sending you gentle hugs for a better day.

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  2. Ahh, thank you, Froggi. This stuff really sucks, doesn't it? I rarely have bad days, and this one isn't "horrible," nevertheless .... ugh.

    Thanks for the hugs. They feel good, 'cause you know how to be gentle in these moments.

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  3. I'm sorry. I have residual fibromyalgia-type symptoms from chemo and the cold does make them worse, but I know it's nothing compared to what you're going through. Which just makes me say, "I'm sorry" again.

    Hope tomorrow is better for you!

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  4. A close friend of mine has fibromyalgia and the people at her place of employment don't treat it as a real medical problem - they think it's just a 'made up syndrome', when in fact it's a very painful thing to go through from what I've seen my friend go through. I hope you feel better. People need to be more educated on it.

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  5. Jen, Yeah, it is miserable, but I'm one of the fortunate ones who has just 4-5 attacks per year and they are usually just a couple days.

    I remember my husband saying during chemo that he felt like his fibro was worse, and the docs said that isn't unusual for that to occur.

    Thanks for the empathy, and my own back to you for your bad times. :)

    Deb, that is, sadly, not an unusual piece of information. these days, it should be less so, however, and shame on those people!

    My first experience was in the 1980s when it really was not recognized. Even the doctors didn't know about it. Some thought I had Chronic Fatigue, but it wasn't quite the right set of symptomology, so I was generally viewed as a head case. What I had at that time was really, really bad, and because no one in the medical field could pin it down, I felt like a weirdo.

    Please pass my empathy along to your friend, and thank you for your kindness.

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  6. I'm so sorry you are hurting. I found your blog thru laura's blog.You're a great writer. I've enjoyed reading it.

    Anyway, I hope you start to feel better soon. Have a terrific week..

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  7. Well I send you love and hugs for a better day too...chronic pain is so debilitating...taking it slow, doing ONLY what you know you can without pushing is the way to go.

    I missed your 500, you missed my 200...but your 500 trumps my 200!!! :)

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  8. Songbird, welcome! And thanks! This will pass. I see this kind of thing as an temporary inconvenience, not a life-altering event. Thanks for the well-wishes!

    Oh, my dear Sherry, we are the pair, aren't we? LOL! I'm SO glad I've trumped you!!

    Yep, I've learned after all these years that I just do what I can and forget the rest until a better day. As I said above, I'm actually pretty fortunate that I have few times in a year that I am this bad. I really can complain ... just whine!! LOL!!

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  9. Hope that you feel better tomorrow, Lynilu. You rarely complain, so this must be bad. My empathy.

    Smokey will have a good home with you on or under or by your deck. I have a feeling if he can be tamed at all, you will be able to do it.

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  10. Hi, Annie, and thank you for the well wishes. I am feeling better this evening, but sometimes the inactivity of the night can make it worse again. We'll see.

    I haven't seen Smokey today. When I checked the food around 5:00, it was still there. :( I hope he is OK. Again, thanks!

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  11. I am so, so sorry you are having a rough day and I hope tomorrow is better. I don't have experience with FM but from what I have heard/read it sounds awful.

    Gentle hugs.

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  12. Casey, thank you. It is a yucky disorder/disease/whatever. As I said, it is fortunate for me that I have few attacks these days. What I went through in the '80s was absolutely awful. I hope I never go there again.

    Thanks for the tender hugs. They help.

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  13. I hope you are feeling better today (as I posted above).

    I bet the kitty will be less skittish well before summer. :)

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If you have something to say about it, just stick out your thumb, and I'll slow down so you can hop aboard! But hang on, 'cause I'm movin' on down the road!!! No time to waste!!!