These are random musings of my life journey, the people, animals, places, and events which have woven, and continue to weave, a tapestry that is me. We all know there is no real destination, only the ongoing experiences which blend together, creating the trail. Each step gives a glimpse of what is to come, without allowing me to see the end result. It is exciting. I have a home base that is mine, that gives me a place to rest. This is it. This is where my heart is, no matter where I journey...................

Thursday, August 28, 2008

A Short Note

Last night China began to weep mucus from her eyes, and she has coughed or sneezed it from her nose several times. I know from this that her lungs are definitely not clearing as they should. She has sniffed at food, but not taken any. She is drinking a little water. In spite of this, she still trots to the door to go outside. That is her indomitable spirit. And it is leading to conflict for me, as I see her trot along with her little tail high over her back, and she looks so .... normal and healthy. But I know she will become uncomfortable before long. I don't want her to struggle for breath. The vet thinks it is probable that cancer has infiltrated her lungs.

Today we will go for a nice long walk. When she tires, I will carry her back home. Or maybe I'll pull the garden wagon and let her ride when she can't walk farther. But we will enjoy the sunshine together one last time.

Then tomorrow I will hold her in my arms while she steps onto the Rainbow Bridge. I can't bear the thought of life without her, but I would hate more for her to be in pain or to fight for breath. I need to let her go where she can rest easily and run freely.


I won't be back here today. I need to be with her.
Itinerary log note by at

19 comments:

  1. traciAugust 28, 2008 9:41 AM

    Oh honey. I'm sorry.

    ReplyDelete
  2. AnonymousAugust 28, 2008 9:45 AM

    So, so sorry.

    I lost my Feather yesterday.

    Peace be with you

    ReplyDelete
  3. Donna McNicolAugust 28, 2008 9:48 AM

    Nothing to say...just sending you sunshine & rainbows.

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  4. CaseyAugust 28, 2008 9:53 AM

    Oh Lynilu - I am so, so sorry. Your post brought me to tears. I've been in your shoes too many times and I know the heartbreak. Love up China with all your might and we will be here loving you.

    Hugs hugs hugs

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  5. CarolineAugust 28, 2008 10:03 AM

    I know this was a hard decision for you and I am so sorry that you will be losing your friend tomorrow. China Doll is one of the sweetest dogs I have ever met and when I think of her I will always think of her laying in the grass soaking up the sun. Please give China a hug and kiss from me and Sophie and tell her that I love her.

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  6. ConstanceAugust 28, 2008 10:10 AM

    Oh sweetie... I can just see you carrying her in your arms or having her enjoy the sunushine in the wagon one last time... Such a hard decision to make. My heart goes out to you and China... So sorry.

    ReplyDelete
  7. AnonymousAugust 28, 2008 11:25 AM

    so sad when happy things must come to an end.......hugs Lyn

    Ruth

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  8. A social worker in the making.August 28, 2008 11:31 AM

    I am so sorry. Hugs and comfort to you and China today and tomorrow.And to the rest of the bunch as they will miss her as well. This is such a hard decision and it takes courage to make it.

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  9. JensterAugust 28, 2008 12:12 PM

    I'm so very sorry. It's so wonderful you get to spend this time with her today. You will be in my prayers.

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  10. Manblogger641August 28, 2008 12:51 PM

    I feel so bad. My heart is with you and China.

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  11. beansAugust 28, 2008 6:52 PM

    Oh, Lyn--hugging you and China today. I am so sorry . . .

    Your post was beautiful-and I will be praying for all of you and the rest of the gang.

    ReplyDelete
  12. MJAugust 28, 2008 7:05 PM

    I'm so sorry. Peace be with you both.

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  13. (M)aryAugust 28, 2008 9:20 PM

    i have had you in my thoughts today!

    ReplyDelete
  14. AnonymousAugust 28, 2008 10:38 PM

    You and your family are in my thougts.

    ReplyDelete
  15. Pepper McKeanAugust 28, 2008 11:47 PM

    I understand your loss and this very difficult decision. I am so sorry.

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  16. JulieAugust 29, 2008 4:59 AM

    I am thinking of you today.

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  17. Monogram QueenAugust 29, 2008 9:12 AM

    Oh Lynilu my heart is breaking for you. I am so so so glad I got to meet darling sweet China Doll!
    Let your other furbabies give you comfort.....

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  18. CarolineAugust 29, 2008 9:28 AM

    Just wanted to let you know that I am thinking of you.

    (((hugs)))

    ReplyDelete
  19. B.S.August 29, 2008 5:58 PM

    China is lucky to have an owner whose priorities are straight, even at this unspeakably difficult time. My thoughts and tears are with you.

    Hugs,
    Betty

    ReplyDelete

If you have something to say about it, just stick out your thumb, and I'll slow down so you can hop aboard! But hang on, 'cause I'm movin' on down the road!!! No time to waste!!!

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