These are random musings of my life journey, the people, animals, places, and events which have woven, and continue to weave, a tapestry that is me. We all know there is no real destination, only the ongoing experiences which blend together, creating the trail. Each step gives a glimpse of what is to come, without allowing me to see the end result. It is exciting. I have a home base that is mine, that gives me a place to rest. This is it. This is where my heart is, no matter where I journey...................

Tuesday, February 09, 2010

Thanks, Caroline!

I read a really nice post over at Linda's place, and I was reminded of something I haven't done in a long while.

My husband passed away in October, 2005. He had been sick for a long time, but he wasn't expected to go when he did, not until just a few months earlier when he was diagnosed with lung cancer. We had been planning our return to New Mexico, home to us both. He came home, but not before his death.

In the spring and summer of 2006, I was back in Kansas City, preparing our home for sale. I was happy that I was going to come home, but it was a hard time for me, too. I was preparing to leave my home, the memories attached to the home, my friends, my job, everything that was my life for the 30 years I'd lived there. I was very alone, not because family and friends neglected me, but because no one could walk in my shoes with me. The happiness about returning to New Mexico was precariously balanced with the pain of leaving so much of my life behind.

One of the "things" I was leaving behind was my friend and next door neighbor, Caroline. My kids had all moved away, Caroline was a little younger than my youngest, and she had become almost like another of my kids. She had been my neighbor for about eight years, but I knew her since she was just a little kid. Her grandmother had been my neighbor in that house for many years, and when she passed away, Caroline bought it.

That spring, '06, Caroline badgered me, just as she had for several months, about starting a blog. OK, OK, OK. So she didn't really badger me. She encouraged me. The thing that held me back was just my silly opinion that blogs were for "kids." Why would a person of my age (61 at that time) have a blog? Finally, I read her posts and a few of those linked to her blog. And I read again. And I eventually broke down. I started a blog in May 2006.

Gradually, I gained a pretty good list of readers. I was really enjoying the "company." By August I had around 20 regular readers and another 10 or so stragglers. I was enjoying reading and being read. It was good for me to be writing and having feedback on what I wrote, rather than bottling it all. The most interesting part to me was the friendships that developed with some of these people, other bloggers I'd never met. But I seriously began to feel friendships with several of them. Yes, I was really glad I had begun the blog.

By the time I left Kansas City in September of that year, I hit the road with my three Shih Tzu, Mai Lin, Ali, and China Doll, a trailer in tow, and with a dozen or so good friends who were moving to NM with me! I brought Caroline and all the others along on the move and set them up in the imaginary house next door! My stepson was here, so I wasn't alone, but I also had a gaggle of buddies who visited my place daily! I really didn't feel alone. I really wasn't alone.

As time went on, I met some of those blogging buddies, my neighbors in Bloggerville, in real life as I traveled. And I gained new friends along the way. As in real life, some of the old friends got lost along the way, because they grew in a different direction or because I did, but the blog roll continued to grow and throb with life.

Then about a year ago Caroline once again began yammering at me. This time it was Facebook. Oh, lawdy, what did I need with something that teenagers were using to get into trouble? Now this was a more difficult decision because you can't really visit FB without signing up. But I was comfortable enough with the electronic cyberworld now that I knew I could back out if I didn't like it, so I took a big breath and plunged in, once again.

Facebook opened a different set of doors and windows than the blog did. With Facebook I've continued many of the relationships that began with blogs. Some of those have stopped their blogs, but many have continued with both, thank goodness. I like the in-depth capability of the blog for most writing, really expressing oneself. FB, however, gave the opportunity to reconnect with old friends I hadn't seen for years or decades as well as those family members that you have just occasional contact as we've grown older and get busy with individual interests and our personal lives. My gosh, within just a short time, my list of contacts on FB had grown to over 100! I didn't know I knew that many people! LOL!

So .... FB has a very different purpose in my cyber-life and my real life than does the blog. Both are important to me. And it is because Caroline gently nudged me to start them both. I loved my technology, yet I would not have entered either, at least not as soon as I did, had it not been for my dear neighbor. I'm so glad she urged me, because through these methods of communication I've gained so much, most importantly the friends and the outlet for expression and connection.

I read somewhere not long ago that over half the blogs are representative of "older" people. I forget the age break, but I think it was age 50. We "seniors" are ruling the world with our communication in the cyber world. Hurray for us! The internet is not just for kids!! I have be in touch with at least 15 people from high school (50 years ago) and college (20+ ago), six or seven former coworkers (10-30 years ago), and a half dozen former neighbors. How much better can it get? I don't know if it can, but if so, I'm betting Caroline will let me know!!

Thank you, Caroline!!!

You rock, my friend!!


  1. Hi Lynilu,
    You expressed very well how I also feel about blogging. My older daughter started my blog for me in Nov. of 2009 right after my first stroke. I didn't even touch the computer before that except for my secretary job. She wanted me to have an outlet that would also let me sit and relax! This isn't Katie that I write about often,my older one lives in NC. Anyway I fell in love with the blogging too. Facebook I just sort of stumbled upon!
    And so sorry about your husband, I can't even imagine the pain that you had to have gone through. Thank God for Caroline and all the other friends and family that you took along! Love Di

  2. Hi Lynilu,

    Although I am new to reading your blog,I really enjoy your insights and perspectives. One of the things I like most about blogging is that the "friends" I've made cover such a great age range. FB is the same, really.

    I love that ladies my age can relate to gals our children's ages. You expressed my own feelings to a "t". Thanks.

    ~hippo hugs~

  3. OH my gosh.....what a sweet post. Thank you so much!!! If you remember it took me almost a year to get you to finally blog and I have loved reading your blog for the last 4 years. I love it because it doesn't seem like you are so far away. I love that I can read about your every day life that I probably would know about if it weren't for the blog.

    I loved being your neighbor and miss you every day. It was always a comfort to me to know that if I ever needed anything you were only a few feet away. The exciting thing day there is a good chance of us being neighbors again.

    I love that picture of me and Sammy. That trip was so much fun and I still laugh when I think about Sammy on the leash. Oh lord....we should have recorded that. :)

    Oh, and now I am craving soe of those chips that I see in the background of the picture.

    I love you my friend.

  4. P.S.

    I still don't think it's fair that you got to meet Patti before me. :)

  5. The internet is a wonderful means for keeping in touch with friends and family. I have been blogging for years now, initially with Bravenet where I made many friends. I had my own domain and pages of pictures of my high school friends and the Missouri town that I attended high school in and many, many more before facebook. Facebook for me takes the place of blogging as it keeps me in touch with family and friends. I enjoy new friends, but my purpose in blogging and facebook is to let our families know how we are doing and to keep in touch with our old friends. Nice meeting you and Caroline Lyn!!!

  6. Di, I've heard of several people who found a lifeline in their blogs, as you say here. I'm glad your daughter got you started. I'm glad I have "met" you!

    Pam, that is one of my favorite things, too. When I first began blogging, one of my favorite people was a 17 yr old girl of Chinese heritage in Australia. She and I marveled at the commonalities we shared, despite the list of differences between us. Sadly, when she went to university, she became busy and I lost contact with her, but the bridge was a great example of how a blog can connect us.

    Moni, I know how important the internet is for you, and you've grown and changed your usage as your needs changed or became outdated. I love it, too, for both similar and different reasons.

  7. Caroline, again, thanks. I know it took you a long time. Originally, I think I couldn't cope with it because I was so lost, wrapped up in Glenn, medical stuff, packing, and I was almost numb at the thought of something new. I'm glad you stayed with it.

    BTW, folks, I kid her about it, but Caroline never pushed me. She just brought it up occasionally and when I said no, she dropped it.

    I hope we will be neighbors again. Gosh, even 10 miles away would be OK!! It's funny you saw those chips! I didn't notice it! I love that picture, too. He was so funny at that stage! Funny and pathetic, too!

    I love you, too, kiddo!

    PS - Girl, ya gotta get outta Dodge to meet the other people in the world!! Gofer it!!

  8. I feel so fortunate that I have met you in blogland. Now we just have to work on getting to meet you in Real Life!

  9. Daisy, I know. It will happen, I'm very sure! I'm glad we met here, too.

  10. Caroline encouraged me to start blogging. Although I thought about writing my story for a long time, this was the perfect outlet. So I thank Caroline also.

  11. She's a good friend, cyber or IRL, isn't she?


If you have something to say about it, just stick out your thumb, and I'll slow down so you can hop aboard! But hang on, 'cause I'm movin' on down the road!!! No time to waste!!!