These are random musings of my life journey, the people, animals, places, and events which have woven, and continue to weave, a tapestry that is me. We all know there is no real destination, only the ongoing experiences which blend together, creating the trail. Each step gives a glimpse of what is to come, without allowing me to see the end result. It is exciting. I have a home base that is mine, that gives me a place to rest. This is it. This is where my heart is, no matter where I journey...................

Wednesday, July 26, 2006

I Can't Believe My Eyes!!!

The painter is here! The painter is here! Really, finally, and thankfully, he is here!

Today, they got the "body" of the house done. There may be a little bit of touch up or second coating to do, but for the first time in 2 months, the house is all one color! This guy is costing me almost twice what the others would have, but then if they don't show up, it doesn't count, now, does it? I wish I could tell you how good it looks even unfinished as it is now. I will take some pictures tomorrow. I was feeling really yucky today, and I didn't even think of it. I'm just incredibly relieved that the house is getting painted. I was sometimes doubting that I'd ever get it done and be able to leave here.

This bipolar weather has been just ripping me a new one. Bouncing from 104 to 74, now back to upper 90s and more 100s to come. AAAARRRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!!!! It just makes my fibromyalgia miserable. There are different symptoms that people experience. Mine happen to be aching in all of the soft tissues (muscles, tendons, soft tissue in joints, etc.) and sometimes extreme sensitivity of the skin. Today has been miserable for the skin. Everything that touched me literally hurt me. I've worn loose fitting clothing, and this helps, but I still hurt. I also had zero energy today, so I sat all day long. Let's hope tomorrow is better. This condition also interrupts sleep, and I slept just 15 - 20 minutes last night, then woke and couldn't sleep the rest of the night. I even tried medication that is supposed to help, but not last night. I'm exhausted. When I finish this, I'm going to bed.

I was rather fortunate today because I found an old friend at home, and we IM'd almost all day. What did we find to talk about that long? The question is what DIDN'T we talk about. It is interesting that we each remember different things or different details about events in which we were both involved. I've noticed this before with family members and other friends, and it never ceases to amaze me that 2 or more people can be in the same place, have the same experience, have a singular conversation, and yet the each come away with different parts of it. One of us has clung to one thing and the other has never completely resolved issues about another matter altogether! No, there are not problems today, but 44 or 46 years ago it was a different story! And we remembered it so differently. I wondered later about others who may have this happen, and never get the chance to compare or repair or explain or resolve something. That is sad, I think. I can remember people I argued with or was hurt by or someone that I might have hurt and then never saw them again. I wonder how they are, if they carry scars or regrets or have they totally forgotten me? Today we mentioned probably 8 or 10 people that we've lost track of and wondered about them.

Here's a question for you: what happens to people who fall into the abyss, who disappear? You know, the ones that are listed in the "missing" section of the reunion memory books. have they been engulfed up by their dreams (wouldn't it be a hoot to find them on Broadway with stage names?), or do they disappear completely (are their bodies somewhere in the desert, now just bones stripped by carrion and bleached by the sun?) or did they change their names because they secretly hated us all? What do you think?

My last thought is that I'm glad I rediscovered this person, because it has been fun and heart warming to realize that something said at 16 don't necessarily last forever. At 62, I'm learning that there is life after 16. WHAT A RELIEF!! Otherwise I'd still be stuck in the 60s!!!!

à demain, mes amis!

10 comments:

  1. Seems to me that if the reunion people can't find you.....you have clearly lucked out and done something right....or if everyone in the class knows exactly what you have done and where you are....you have clearly lucked out and done something right (negative behaviors excepted) It's the middle ground where they can find you and nobody knows what you have been doing.......not good

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  2. What an interesting chat with your friend! It is amazing how different people remember different things about the same conversation or event isn't it? I've experienced similar things when talking with people from a long time ago...actually even when talking to my kids about something that occurred ohhh...yesterday! LOL

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  3. I'm very glad you got the painting done and sorry you are feeling bad and having trouble sleeping.
    I have never gone to a class reunion yet maybe i'll go to my 25th one. Catching up with old friends is very cool though!

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  4. I thought I saw you doing a "happy dance" yesterday. Now I know why. :) This weather is driving me crazy as well. We are about to become hermits again this weekend. I am soooo ready for fall.

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  5. seven - I agree. In fact just this morning was remarking that I can see many extremes in my life. Those are the things that stick in the memory. I also noted that I'd honestly like to have more middle of the road things for a while, just to have calm. Truth be known, however, I'd quickly become bored. So if you hear me pleading or ranting for "normal" just slap me once to bring me back to myself.

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  6. traci - I always love when I find old friends and have that opportunity to take that slow drive down memory lane, especially when the other's recall differs, because it just adds to my own. And, come on! You don't really expect your kids to remember the way you do!! I know . . . mine didn't either!!

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  7. patti - You know, it is interesting how people feel about reunions. Some love them. I do. I've had a ball at each one. Other hate them, think people are phony (and some always will be). And the 3rd group don't go because they don't care or really don't want to relive the past. I've personally found that I come away feeling good, because I hear that they don't remember me as awkward and insecure as I felt back then. Well, if you go, I hope you enjoy it as much as I do!

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  8. caroline - OMG!! I hope you saw the part of my happy dance where I still had my clothes on!! ;-)) The weather. Yeah. No, I don't wanna talk about that again. Ick. I'm ready for fall, too.But I'll probably find something to grouse about then also!! I'm like that!

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  9. It's amazing what a fresh coat of paint can do!

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  10. ragged - Oh, yes!! They have now painted the trim and I'm almost to tears, seeing how beautiful it looks!

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If you have something to say about it, just stick out your thumb, and I'll slow down so you can hop aboard! But hang on, 'cause I'm movin' on down the road!!! No time to waste!!!