These are random musings of my life journey, the people, animals, places, and events which have woven, and continue to weave, a tapestry that is me. We all know there is no real destination, only the ongoing experiences which blend together, creating the trail. Each step gives a glimpse of what is to come, without allowing me to see the end result. It is exciting. I have a home base that is mine, that gives me a place to rest. This is it. This is where my heart is, no matter where I journey...................

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

Where is this going?

I'm beginning to think I'm "all blogged out." 

I seem to be completely without inspiration to write here. Every time in the past week or so I have begun to write, I can't finish the first sentence. Before that, I've struggled for several weeks. I'm sad that it seems my brain has gone on vacation, because I've enjoyed my contact here, meeting new friends, and expressing myself in a myriad of ways, from thoughtful to bizarre.

It has been five and  half years since I began. I've written nearly 2200 posts, and that doesn't count the 150 or so with cartoons that I deleted because of the picture storage. That's a lot of writing! I don't understand this sudden blank slate. And it seems the more I try to figure it out, the blanker the slate seems to be. As a friend used to say, "too much analyzation leads to paralyzation."

This tends to be a difficult time of the year for me with several family deaths, and a number of special pet deaths in past Octobers and Novembers may be a factor. I dislike the commercial aspects of the Christmas season and the frenetic pace society takes on, so I tend to seclude myself. I've been incredibly busy at work and socially recently, and perhaps I'm not giving myself enough "self time." I'm feeling some cut-off from significant people, a indicator of some depression. I don't have "that special person," be it partner or friend, to lean on, to talk with. Who knows. Maybe just a funk. And again, "too much analyzation leads to paralyzation."

I don't know what all this means. I am have another inspired burst and begin writing again soon, or this may simply drift into oblivion.

Wish me luck.

17 comments:

  1. Maybe your facebook posts are taking the place of the blogging? I'm finding I cannot do the immediacy of facebook - my sense of humour doesn't seem to be to the fore. I admire the funny comments others make, but I am stumped.

    Here's hoping you are back to your blogging self soon.

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  2. You know, Freda, when I started on FB I said that I liked it for the rapid--fire immediacy of staying in touch, but noted that it lacks the (hmmm, not sure what to call it ....) "volume" of being able to expound on an idea.

    I'm afraid we are losing the art of writing (communication, in general?), of developing expressive paragraphs in favor of the brief posts that we find on FB. And while humor is wonderful, I treasure the grist of many blogs. Now recently I find that all I am capable of producing are those short, "five minutes and I'm outta here" kind of things. I hope I recover, as this goes against everything I espouse!

    I hope, too, that this is a passing thing.

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  3. I think it is a passing thing. It is a bit like "writer's Block". The more you think and wonder the less able you are to relax and just do it. I don't think you should worry about it, just get on with your life and one day you'll find you want to blog again. Most of your followers will still be there, and you'll pick up new ones along the way.

    I hope things improve for you soon

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  4. Oh my, I can so relate to your feelings ~ blog bog! I've been having a difficult time sticking to it and although I have plenty to say I find myself wordless. I can also relate to the seasonal thing of memories, etc. The main thing through the 'CHRIST'mas season is to reflect on CHRIST. Keep Him close on a daily basis... not just the holidays and you will be just fine. Please don't throw in the towel just yet.
    'hugs from afar'

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  5. Jenny, history tells me that when I more or less give up is when I do relax, and it usually returns. It is just so frustrating! I suppose I reflecting my human side with the impatience with lack of control! Oh, and don't forget the self-doubt .... "Sheesh, will this be boring to my readers??" Ah, vain, imperfect humans!

    Cher, that is true, but my irritation goes even beyond that. This wonderful season has become the epitome of useless, unnecessary, frivolous spending, buying the biggest and best of the stores rather than giving the biggest and best of themselves. The best of Corporate America vs. the best of Ourselves and our Creator? It makes me very sad.

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  6. When you feel the desire to post you will. Even an occasional "I'm still here" post is fine. The blog world will go on, and you will always be welcome to return.

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  7. Oh I know what you mean Lyn. I've been there too. Sometimes I think about giving up on blogging. And there are times when I do enjoy the break from it. Other times I'm just indifferent about the whole thing.

    But then all of a sudden it will hit me. The urge to post again. I think it gets in our blood. I've only been posting since 2008 and that alone freaks me out!

    You know I've told you in the past that you are one of my very favorite Bloggers. You're in my top three actually! So you see, you are loved!!

    I do like that saying,"Too much analyzation leads to paralyzation". How true. I need to text that to my husband.

    So my friend, if I have to come up with shit to write about , so do you. No pressure though,o.k.?

    Love you, Di ♥

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  8. A wonderful description of exactly how I'm feeling... minus your personal reasons for sadness at this time of year. I haven't been blogging either. Have you missed me? Neither has anyone else! It takes an enormous amount of time for me, what with working on all the pictures and then the words.... and facebook... and life. As we're winding down this year of travel, which I am very ready for, I wonder what will I blog about when we're at home.

    So, I'm right there with you and we'll be seeing where it goes together, long distance!

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  9. Merikay, are you kidding me??? sputter*gasp*choke The blog world goes on WITHOUT ME??? NOOOOO!!! ;D Yes, you're right, when the time is right I will.

    Di, you're willing to share "digging up shit" with me? How nice of you!! LOL! I know it will come back at some time. I'm just impatient. And back atcha on the favs!

    MM, believe it or not, I do miss your posts, but you're still on my blog roll, so I know when you put one up. I'll hang in if you will!

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  10. I know from my own experience, when things become busy at work, I tend to withdraw and not be as verbal. I think it's knowing the weight of what's going on and also knowing an outlet doesn't really exist for it. Perhaps that's a factor on top of the other things you mentioned.

    Whatever it causing your writer's block, just let it sit and eventually, you'll come back to writing when you're moved to do so.

    No rush...we'll be here when you're ready :)

    Kelly

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  11. I've been thinking about you, and wondering where you have been when it comes to blogging.

    I think that blogging ebbs and flows. I find that in my own blogging life.

    I hope you find your way back to regular posting, but one should never feel pressure. A blog is for fun, or it should cease to be. i never want my blog to become something that brings me pressure.

    Take care. The holidays are rough. I'd like to see that one special person in your life. You are such a lovely person.

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  12. I would be so sad if you didn't blog!!! But...I do understand about not feeling the want to blog. I want to continue writing and recording my life, so sometimes I just force myself to blog. So far it has worked and usually once I start writing I find the words and I have my post.

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  13. Kelly, that's true about being busy at work. I know it will pass, but the waiting stinks!

    RET, I doubt that I will permanently go away from Blogville. I'm just frustrated, you know? And thanks. That's a sweet thing to say. :)

    Caroline, I've begun so many posts, I can't even guess at the number. But I write a sentence or two or three, and then .... blank. Oh well, it will probably be fine in time.

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  14. There have been times when I have gone weeks without posting. When you have something to say, you will.

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  15. Best of luck, Lynilu.
    Sounds a bit like depression to me.
    You can always take time off from blogging, it's your blog, after all, and when you get back, people will return too.

    With all that work and all those social occasions, is there no material there? Any funny people or jobs?

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  16. I always have a change of moods too with the coming of the first blast of cold air. And I certainly can sympathize trying to find blog topics. But there are a few people who depend on my posts to keep track of me (us), though they rarely comment. That'll probably keep me blogging through to the near future anyway.

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If you have something to say about it, just stick out your thumb, and I'll slow down so you can hop aboard! But hang on, 'cause I'm movin' on down the road!!! No time to waste!!!